Chicken salad

[Fansome]

We got a supermarket rotisserie chicken last week. We ate the dark meat, which left us with the white meat, which neither of us care for by itself. So, we did what we usually do: turn the white meat into chicken salad:

white meat from the chicken, coarsely chopped
1/4 small yellow onion, coarsely chopped
1/2 rib celery, coarsely chopped
freshly ground pepper, to taste
mayonnaise, enough to bind everything together, maybe a cup or a cup and a half

Personally, I like to add some sweet pickle relish, and sometimes tarragon or dill, but the GF is a harsh master, and she doesn't like those...

[Pigmeat]

Give her a spanking and tell her to go sit in the corner, a man is at work.

[Traveling Wave]

Try adding some chopped red seedless grapes to the mix or chopped glazed pecans and golden raisins. 

[Pigmeat]

Don't call it "Chicken Salad". Call it "Mashed Chicken". It sounds more manly.

It sound's like this new woman is more assertive than the last one, you're going to have to check her early and often to get her in line.

Buy her a fancy hairbrush. She'll think it's a wonderful present, but we both know the flat side is to be used as paddle when she tries to get bossy, like telling you to bathe or brush your tooth.  A man has to be crafty when he's breaking in a new woman. A living, breathing, man is a rare bird in a place like Shady Acres where the women outnumber the men five to one. There are plenty of other blue haired beauties roaming the grounds, don't be afraid to let her know you know it.

I'm here with advice on women any time you need me.

[Fansome]

You're such a pal.

Don't call it "Chicken Salad". Call it "Mashed Chicken". It sounds more manly.

It sound's like this new woman is more assertive than the last one, you're going to have to check her early and often to get her in line.

Buy her a fancy hairbrush. She'll think it's a wonderful present, but we both know the flat side is to be used as paddle when she tries to get bossy, like telling you to bathe or brush your tooth.  A man has to be crafty when he's breaking in a new woman. A living, breathing, man is a rare bird in a place like Shady Acres where the women outnumber the men five to one. There are plenty of other blue haired beauties roaming the grounds, don't be afraid to let her know you know it.

I'm here with advice on women any time you need me.

[Pigmeat]

I do my best.

[PirateSWL]

There is nothing better then good chicken salad. Has to be made with Hellman's Mayo !

[Fansome]

Actually, I prefer Miracle Whip.

There is nothing better then good chicken salad. Has to be made with Hellman's Mayo !

[Pigmeat]

Why don't you just add snot? There's no difference between it and mayo.

[skeezix]

freshly ground pepper, to taste

What kind of peppercorns?

Tellicherry would go well here, but then, they would go well with just about everything.

White peppercorns would go well, and if you want something a bit more subdued, try green peppercorns.

If you can't decide, put in all three.

[Fansome]

Martha Stewart would be proud.

Why don't you just add snot? There's no difference between it and mayo.

[Pigmeat]

Martha Stewart would be proud.

As would 99% of teenage fast food workers. What do you think the "secret sauce" is?

Don't be knockin' my girl, Martha. She revolutionized the art of raisin jack production while she was in that Federal lock-up. It's all in proofing your yeast.

[MDK2]

The best use for chicken salad:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wtfNE4z6a8

[MDK2]

There is nothing better then good chicken salad. Has to be made with Hellman's Mayo !

Or Best Foods.

[Josh]

Speaking of salad;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1J3NLNWAPU