One for you, me, and our cousin Jerry Lee, the latter as an apology for the abysmal way he and his bride were treated there in 1958. JL gets to escort the Queen as her husband and second cousin, Prince Phil isn't up to it.
Bunch of hypocrites, Jerry Lee and Myra were third cousins and they ruined his career. Not a word in the British press about the Windsor Hillbillies rompin' around Buckingham Palace cranking out congenital idiots at the drop of a hat. No wonder we whupped 'em in two wars, and had to bail 'em out twice when they went messin' around with a bunch of Germans in pointy hats. Pathetic! I hope Jerry Lee cops a feel mid-ceremony or at least steals her purse.
You want to make it triple wedding with your GF and SO, Al? I've still got those Mormon wedding drawers in the box. A free hitchin' by the Archbishop of Canterbury at Westminster Cathedral and a pre and post wedding wagon ride. I betcha one of those Beefeaters would loan you his beaver hat to go down the aisle in.
When I give the girls away and go to my place among the attendants, I'll be sure to holler out "Atta Boy, Al!" when you do that double "I do". I'm not letting some funny looking kid steal your thunder. The acoustics in Westminster Cathedral are amazing, ever live mic within miles should be able to hear me. It will be glorious day on the planet.
That Harry kid perplexes me. He doesn't look a damn thing like his father or his mother. Probably a recessive gene popping up due to all that in and interbreeding among European nobility? We know his Daddy couldn't get any action if he had 100 pound notes glued to his forehead, and his mother was pure as the driven snow.