Roadkill (An Epic Poem)
By Fish
From out of the night came a roaring blast
A chopped up Shovel, goin’ way too fast
One hand twistin’ hard on the throttle
The other holdin’ on to the neck of a bottle
He finished his whiskey, tossed the bottle of glass
Just missin’ the Troopers, hot on his ass
There were three, maybe four Crown Vics in pursuit
All cockin’ their weapons, gettin’ ready to shoot
The long stretch of straight-a-way was nearing it’s end
And the road up ahead took a wicked sharp bend
When he got to the curve, he laid it right down
His wheels hit the curb, and that brought him around
He popped up and gunned it, like a bat out of Hell
The Troopers didn’t have it nearly so well
All four of them slammed on their anti-lock brakes
And secretly wondered: Who’d go to their wakes?
The man on the bike with backward smile
Saw all the cars land in a crumpled up pile
He eased off on the gas and cruised towards the West
There were miles to go before he could rest
As the dawn broke behind him, he saw a sign up ahead
“Good Eats” “Bikers Welcome” was all that it said
Pulled into the parking lot in front of the place
Passed two dozen nice scoots till he found him a space
He stopped for a minute to look all around
Then he suddenly noticed, there wasn’t a sound
All those bikes would have meant a sizable crowd
And bikers are one bunch that tend to be loud
Another odd thing, (his eyes were still keen)
Was the level of dust there on every machine
Like they’d been there for months, or maybe a year
Not like the owners had just stopped for beer
With this puzzle still rattlin’ around in his brain
He walked into the diner as it started to rain
There were plenty of bikers (a real biker venue)
So he found a free table and looked for a menu
A waitress named “Ginny” came over to say
Would he like to see the Specials on the menu today?
He said, “Your pretty special, from where I’m sittin’”
Then she blushed like a schoolgirl, and purred like a kitten,
“We don’t get many smooth talkin’ gentlemen here
While you look at the menu, can I get you a beer?”
The man nodded and winked and said: “A beer….in a glass”
Then he watched her walk off, admirin’ her ass
While she was gone the man looked all around
Despite all the people, there still wasn’t a sound
Nursin’ their drinks were hard men in black leather,
And the chicks that were with them, lookin’ dark as the weather
‘Cause the weather outside went from just heavy rain
To blowin’ and howlin’ like a hurricane
“Well, I won’t have to wash my bike again soon,”
Chuckled the man as he watched the monsoon
He turned to a biker nearby and he said,
“That’s a hellavuh storm, that’ll sure wake the dead!”
The biker gave him a long, hard, cold leer
And said, “You need to get right the fuck outta here”
The man jumped to his feet with a grin
And said, “OK Buddy, bring it on, I’m in!”
But the biker just knocked back a slug from his drink
“Those weren’t fightin’ words. At least, not like you think”
The man stood still with his fists in the air
While the rest of the joint, looked away…didn’t care
So he sat back and waited, he stared at the wall
He was startin’ to not like this place, not at all
When the waitress finally showed up with his beer
He drank it straight down, left a twenty. Said, “Here
Keep the change, I’m leavin’. This joint is too slow.”
He walked to the door, “I got places to go”
But the door wouldn’t open, kinda like it was stuck.
He pulled and he yanked, then he turned and said, “Fuck!”
“Who’s the dead man that that tried to lock me in here?”
As he looked ‘round the room, anger gave way to fear.
As if by a signal, the bikers rose to full height.
One said, “Dead man is the first thing you finally got right.”
Then Ginny came back and took the man by the arm
Said, “Don’t be afraid, they don’t mean you no harm.”
“It’s just you don’t know the rules, ‘cause you’re new
I’ll explain it as simple as I know how to do
Remember the cops and that curve from last night?”
“How the hell’d she know that?” He thought, “This just ain’t right”
“Well,” she continued, “you didn’t survive
In fact, as of last night, you’re no longer alive
And this is where dead bikers go when the die
So sit back and relax, honey, I wouldn’t lie”
So he sat and he ordered himself a fresh brew
And carefully considered the life that he knew
Here he would stay, though he never could tell
Whether he was in Heaven or he was in Hell
If you find yourself tired, your eyes turnin’ red
And you see a sign “Bikers Welcome, Good Eats” up ahead
Don’t stop, don’t look, ‘cause as sure as you do
There’ll be dust for all time on your scooter too
For Weezel See you on the other side
Topic: Have a Ball (Read 1762 times)
